We went to a lovely wedding of two dear friends this week in the bucolic foothills of the Chilterns. Held in the beautiful countryside on an English Summer’s day, it was a joyful day.
I was reminded that:
a) there’s stupendous beauty all around and I must take more time out to appreciate nature on London’s doorstep, Japanese ‘forest bathing’ being the new Mindfullness.
b) how exciting to catch up with friends from one’s youth, remembering old times, the laughs and fun, how no one ever really changes, and the affection we all have for one another.
c) how wonderfully life affirming a wedding is, celebrating two people wanting to spend their lives together.
In the old Church of St Mary Magdalene, I found myself immensely moved by the ceremony. How much love and kindness there was in the church, and what an eternally human optimism marriage is.
I was so happy to witness a promise by 2 people to share the rest of their lives together:
“ to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part, according to God’s holy ordinance; and thereto I pledge myself to you.”
These vows are traditional but they mean so much, and not just in marriage, but in family and friendship bonds.
A marriage ceremony in front of family and friends symbolises that no man is an island. We are there not just as witnesses but as supporters of the couple and their union. Yes, it’s a party, but we can also have a stake in the happy couple’s partnership.
Two vital ingredients for a lifelong relationship, be it marriage or friendship, is of course love and kindness. It is essential to have these two values in abundance, so that when rocky times happen, we can fall back on them to carry us through the tears and pain. They are the foundation of a good marriage, to sweeten daily life and to sustain a life-long partnership.
Alice Fresson Life Coach 